Before I married my husband John and chose to take his name, Havey (there is no R !!) I was Elizabeth Pfordresher…that’s P as in Peter, F as in Frank, o r d etc LOL…and a wave to my fellow Pfordreshers on Facebook, because there are now quite a few of us! THANK GOD.
Because all our lives, we Pfordreshers had to provide help with the spelling of our name, and thus, we all got quite good at it…on the phone, meeting someone for the first time, in a doctor’s office… that’s p as in Peter, f as is Frank, ord, re, sh, er! Simple, right.
But there was also the occasional dodge…thus, on a drive to D.C. we stop for a meal. Jinni, our mom, sends my brother John into a restaurant to make a reservation. “Just give the name FORD,”she tells him as he exits the car. John has always been creative when following directions.
“Reservation for Ford,” he tells the woman at the desk. “But we’re not the ones who make cars.”
Thanks, John, for making sure we weren’t charged for being rich. Do we we look rich? I don’t think so! LOVE THAT STORY. Love how our name carried some tenderness with it…
“Pfordresher? Oh yes, I knew your father, he was my dentist, but he died so early, wonderful man….” in the grocery store, the library, EVERY doctor’s office we ever entered…many doctors cutting or eliminating fees, because….thanks, Dad.
But sometimes recognizing our unusual name could backfire. And our mother Jinni, attributing some of her reactions to her RED HAIR. So it’s June, and we are driving to the St. Barnabas Convent to give our teachers, the nuns, a celebratory cake for the end of the school term. But a cop follows and then stops my mother, sending her to the local police station to get a tick for not making a full stop. As usual Mom complies….but at the police station, the innocent across the counter looks up, smiles and says, “Pfordresher, like in doctor Pfordresher?”
“Yes,” my mother responds as tartly as possible, “I’m his widow!” You go MOM. But she was ticketed anyway. Our mother, strong, loving, amazing…we were so blessed.
COLLEGE and BEYOND
When I graduated from Mundeline College on the north-side of Chicago, I was still a Pfordresher…but then years later, I got a phone call: Mundeline wanted to interview me, have me provide them with memories of my days at this amazing college for women. (We did have one male in our class, Shawn, an art major, who I knew from grade school. Chicago is not that big a city!) I said yes, the interview was long, interesting and is now available on line….which is lovely, because I do think about my professors, want to thank them. In many ways they formed who I am today.
BUT AGAIN, WHAT ‘S IN A NAME? WHAT DO WE TAKE WITH US?
PAUL O’DEA
There was , my freshman English teacher, his class a requirement. Our first assignment, I will never forget it: we women were to write an essay about being a woman. I don’t remember exactly how Mr. O’Dea worded it, but you get the idea.
Days later, after we had handed in our assignments, Mr. O’Dea stood before us waving our papers in the air. I cannot quote him exactly, but he was shouting, something like: There isn’t a woman in this class that gets it…that you are women, that you have power. You write about people opening doors for you, or being relieved with a fellow student likes you! WHERE IS YOUR USE OF POWER? WAKE UP. THIS IS YOUR TIME, GRAB THE POWER AVAILABLE TO YOU, or at least ACKNOWLEDGE IT!
Wow, we were stunned, he right. He opened our eyes for us.
ANNE MATASAR: THE CHANGING WORLD WE LIVE IN:
Another freshman course requirement was Social Studies. Anne Matasar, our sociology professor, took us on, and again WOW, she had her work cut out for her, she was amazing. First off, we had to subscribe to a Chicago newspaper and READ IT every day. We had to know what was going on in the culture, the lives of people who did not have the advantages we had. It was time for us to wake up to Supreme Court decisions, know some of the major ones like Brown vs the Board of Education, Gideon vs Wainwright, Miranda vs Arizona. Prof. Dr. Matasar opened our eyes to government mistakes at a time when people living in mental institutions were suddenly put out on the streets to deal with life as best they could. And in some ways she prepared us for the death of Robert Kennedy and Martin Luther King. Our time was a time of change, and Dr. Matasar inspired me to run for class vice president, a small taste of government.
DR. MICHAEL FORTUNE. THE ONE PROFESSOR TO ALWAYS REMEMBER…. Tall, bald, cerebral, Dr. Fortune stood during his lectures, sometimes pacing, often allowing us to make a comment, ask a questions. We read Shakespeare’s Hamlet, parts of the Canterbury Tales, Great Expectations, Jane Eyre etc. He was brilliant and could talk about these works as if he had read them the previous night. Maybe he had. He also talked about his own life, being raised in New York City in Hells Kitchen, how he had to work to pay for his books, earn scholarships, prepare himself to share with us. He also stood, often rubbing his bald head, creating sentences we all wanted to write down, never forget. Michael Fortune was a gift. He died in 2010.
And finally, something simple and basic to share with you…my ability to help pay for my tuition by working in the Alumnae Office with the caring and lovely Carmen Fernandez. We became close, she understanding if I had to leave early, a paper was due. She brought me foods she had prepared, wanted to share, and during graduation time, Carmen invited about about six us to her home for a special dinner. She was another gift in a time when I had to make things happen…work, homework, long nights in the library. Inspiration from so many who I will never forget.
THANKS FOR READING