Look and You Will Find…Encouragement

Writer and published author Therese Fowler wrote this to me on Writer Unboxed: 

Beth, obviously I can’t predict how your journey will go, but I often say that commitment is the first and most important factor for success. A dear friend of mine wrote a half-dozen novels before finally getting her first book deal at age 60, and it only happened because she kept improving her craft and didn’t give up her dream. Maybe that sounds cheesy, but it’s true! I hope your road ahead is smoother than it’s been.  Therese Fowler 

And then there was this:

Can’t imagine coming here and not seeing you actively involved as a writer, Beth. Whatever brought you to writing may or may not be what will keep the fire fully lit now, but I bet you know what will. Hugs!  Susan Turner

WOW, SO KIND 

These and words from others truly matter. They are amazingly helpful, lighting me up, keeping me going. And whether you are a writer, an athlete, a scientist…it doesn’t matter. There are days when you doubt yourself, doubt your choices.

So what to do when that happens…if I am strong, I write. And thus I have kept an essay, THOUGHTS OF A CHILD REMEMBERED. But what feels most poignant in that piece, is not what I wrote about remembering, but about my being able to forget.

THE HELPFUL WORDS, THE REALIZATION CAME FROM MY MOTHER 

One night, after my father’s death (and many of you know he died leaving my mother with three children, 6, 3 and 3 months)…she told me that she had gone wearily to bed, only to awaken the next day to realize, that she had lived ONE ENTIRE DAY without mourning my father. Yes, she told me, she felt guilty, but she also realized she was healing. I guess this is the irony of living, because in our daily lives, there is always much that we will forget…and maybe much that will help us keep living if we do forget. 

SOME CONCLUSIONS

We need to forgive ourselves for being human. We need to forgive others if they misunderstand us. For years I found it fascinating to ask friends what was the first thing they remembered. Yes, I had this background that was unlike most of my peers. Yes, we had a photo of my father in our living room, and we looked at it every day. Because in some ways we were different.

But then a close friend revealed that her father had left the family. And another had a father who was now dying of cancer. LIFE IS NOT PERFECT for any of us. It can deliver heartache, challenge us in different ways. 

I write this, knowing that social media often requires that ALL IS WONDERFUL! But I think we are currently way beyond that, sharing our fears, angers…but always our hopes. 

Maybe it comes down to this: look and you will find love, encouragement, understanding, and always someone else who has walked a similar road. We need those who nod and say, YES, I understand. 

THANKS TO THERESE ANNE FOWLER   Thanks for reading.